The Attempted Merging of SG1 and Atlantis
by StarSkimmer
Summary: What would happen if SG1 was forced to move to Atlantis permanently? Short parody type ficlet.


Disclaimer: Stargate Atlantis and SG-1 don't belong to me. If they did, SG-1 would NOT be ending with only ten measly seasons.

A/N: I wrote this to protest SG-1 being cancelled, and the idea of putting SG-1 as permanent characters in Atlantis. cough NO WAY cough

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On the first day, they got along well. Weir gave the new team a formal tour of Atlantis. Everyone was happy enough.

On the second day, it was a little more strained. Carter and McKay got into a small argument, but that was it.

On the third day, Mitchell joined Sheppard and Ronon on their morning run. Mitchell outran Sheppard, hands down. Later that day Mitchell got trapped in a malfunctioning transporter and had to be rescued by Carter. Oddly enough, a video camera showed Colonel Sheppard loitering by the transporter a few minutes before Mitchell entered it. John claimed to have nothing to do with the incident, though.

On the fourth day, Sheppard made the mistake of inviting Teal'c to stick fighting practice. Teal'c beat Ronon. The Satedan was not too happy, but didn't show it.

On the fifth day, Teyla took Vala to the mainland. She managed to accidentally insult every Athosian present in less than twenty minutes. Teyla didn't speak much to her after that, but things were still good.

On the sixth day, Carter and McKay got into another argument. It wasn't that bad. They only sustained minor injuries.

On the seventh day, Sheppard and Mitchell went on a mission to MH2-7Y5 together. Sheppard came back seething, and nobody knew why. It might have had something to do with the fact that every woman on the planet had doted on Mitchell while ignoring him. Just maybe.

On the eighth day, Daniel found out about the retrovirus and Michael. He argued with Elizabeth about the morality of turning Wraiths into humans only to kill them later. Dr. Jackson was later seen storming out of Weir's office.

On the ninth day, Vala was seen flirting with Ronon. Teyla found out. The relationship between the two women grew slightly frostier.

On the tenth day, Ronon and Teal'c got into a major fight. At first, Sheppard and Daniel tried to restrain them. When Mitchell got involved, though, Sheppard accidentally punched him in the nose. Then Teyla bumped into Vala, and Carter 'unintentionally' stepped on McKay's foot. Things spiraled downwards from there.

On the eleventh day Dr. Weir gave both teams SGA-1 and SG-1 a long, angry lecture on the little brawl they'd had. Somehow the situation got away from her, though, and she managed to get into another moral argument on the Wraith and retrovirus with Daniel. This time she was the one to storm out of the room.

On the twelfth day, the two teams tried to get along. Honestly they did. Things just… got out of hand. Carter was caught trying to sneak some lemon juice in McKay's coffee. Teyla and Vala were found fighting with daggers. Major Lorne walked into Teal'c's room just in time to see Ronon stuffing gunpowder into the meditation candles. Mitchell was seen in Sheppard's favorite puddle jumper, rigging it so that it would crash on its next flight, while Sheppard was busy re-arranging the mission assignments so that Mitchell would somehow wind up on a Wraith-infested planet.

Still, it was only until Dr. Weir found herself sleepwalking to Daniel's bedside with a knife in her hand that she finally realized that things couldn't go on like this.

----Day thirteen----

"Are you sure you want to do this?" asked Dr. Weir anxiously. "I know that the past few days have been… rather strained… but I'm sure with more time we could work out our… differences."

SG-1 stood by the Atlantis Stargate, waiting to leave. Weir and Colonel Sheppard's team loitered close by, paying their respects. True, both Teal'c and Ronon sported black eyes, and McKay was still a little puffy from drinking that citrus, but they were all sincerely sad to see SG-1 go. Well, not sad exactly, but less than happy.

"We're sure," said Mitchell. "We don't belong here. The occasional crossover is nice, but living here permanently? Not so nice."

"Living in another program for extended periods does seem to create unnecessary conflict," Teal'c said.

"Couldn't put it better myself," muttered McKay.

"Where're you guys going to go?" Ronon asked.

"Yeah, you don't have a show anymore," Sheppard said.

"We'll manage," replied Mitchell. "It's not like this is the first time we've lived in a show that died." Glancing at his team members, he corrected, "Well, for Vala and me, anyway."

Weir nodded, serious and solemn. "Good luck. We wish you the best of success."

"Send postcards."

"Don't forget to visit."

SG-1 walked up to the Stargate, stepping through one by one until only Mitchell was left. He turned back briefly, waved, and was gone.

Weir, Sheppard, and the others stood in silence by the 'gate long after it had been deactivated. Ronon finally broke the silence. "Wonder what's going to happen to them."

"They'll be okay," said Sheppard half-heartedly. Nobody really believed him. Elizabeth wondered what it would be like to have your show die, have her show die, and shuddered. Hopefully that wouldn't happen to Atlantis in a while to come.

In the meantime…

"All right, everybody, we have work to do. The Wraith could come at any time and we need to be prepared. Rodney, I wanted to talk to you about the depleted ZPM…"

----The End----

A/N: Thanks to my sister for beta-ing. Please review! Constructive criticism is welcome.


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